So, it has been a ridiculous amount of time since I last wrote on this blog. It was right before the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays and my life became a mad dash to complete crochet projects before Dec. 25th. And then the holidays were over, but work kicked into high gear and the last thing I wanted to do was sit in front of this computer and type up a thesis on how and why I want to be a better person than I am now. And then people started inviting me to play Words with Friends (I blame you BF) and suddenly perfectly good blog time is spent trying to figure out how to put a freaking Z on a TL space and now it is March. How is that for becoming a better person?
It has been spring break here and that meant pretty much nothing as far as my day to day life was concerned, but Miss A did have break from preschool this week. Of course, spring break started last Friday with her emotionally stating, "I don't want to go to spring break!" like it was a place. Of course, at four years old, school is the place you want to be and break is the thing that separates you from your friends for a week. She survived and was as silly and creative and fun as ever, with suprisingly few emotional swings (from her or from me...). We took walks around the neighborhood when I got home from work and she practiced riding her bicycle. Pretty mundane stuff, unless you are four. She looked at everything as such an adventure and each little step as an accomplishment. I wish I did that more.
I wish I remembered around each corner is something new and interesting. I wish I looked at each new day as a fresh beginning.
She loves to "role play." At any point in time, I am Barbie to her Skipper or Queen Clarion to her Tinker Bell. It is hard to stay in character sometimes (for me, not for her). She will remind me that I am not Mom right now, I am someone else. It's nice to be someone else. I wish I could do it more often. But it isn't realistic. I am not a method actor. Even in plays in school, I never tried to "become" the role. I just tried to find the best timing and inflection to get the biggest laugh. These days, my acting method involves asking Miss A "Can I be Queen Clarion doing the dishes?" I feel like I am cheating her on play time that way, but one day she will thank me that she doesn't live in a house from "Hoarders."
I think as I am teaching her to be a grown up, she is teaching me to be a kid. I rode a bicycle for the first time in twenty years last week. It was just up and down the block, but it was a start. She cheered me on the way I cheer her on when she rides her small bike. I plan on getting on that bike as much as I can this summer. By the way, the saying, "It's just like riding a bicycle" may be true, but note the saying isn't "It's just like taking the first push off the ground on a bicycle" because I am not kidding, I wasn't sure how to start. I felt the same trepidation and excitement I know she feels when she is pedaling.
But in that moment after I started pedaling, when I was once again using my own momentum to move forward and figuring out how to keep my balance and round corners? That was AWESOME.
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